38 pages • 1 hour read
Sylvia DayBared To You
Fiction | Novel | Adult | Published in 2012A modern alternative to SparkNotes and CliffsNotes, SuperSummary offers high-quality Study Guides with detailed chapter summaries and analysis of major themes, characters, and more.
Themes
Control as a Survival Mechanism
As survivors of childhood sexual abuse, both Eva and Gideon struggle to navigate adulthood while grappling with impact of their respective residual trauma. In different ways, Eva and Gideon turn to control as a survival tactic. Described as “shrewd and assessing,” Gideon maintains strict control over every aspect of his life (6). His dominance offers him power and safety. Eva relies on her independence as a shield to protect herself from growing too attached to others around her. Self-reliant, Eva strives to maintain a control that allows her to feel empowered and no longer victimized. In the therapy session with her mother, Dr. Petersen reiterates Eva’s need for control to her mother when he advises her to “‘respect her rights to establish boundaries now in the manner that best suits her’” (200). Ultimately, Eva and Gideon’s dependence on maintaining control alienates them from true human connection. Through their relationship with each other, Eva and Gideon learn how relinquishing control builds trust and allows them to experience true unconditional love.
From the onset of their relationship, Eva feels an undeniable pull to release the control and independence that dictate her life. Her physical attraction to Gideon “was impossible to control” and leads Eva to make uncharacteristic decisions to pursue a relationship with Gideon (105). As their sexual and emotional relationship progresses, Eva delights in the control she surrenders to Gideon and proclaims, “He’d controlled me completely, and how freakin’ sexy was that?” (131). Despite her pleasure, Eva struggles with her own insecurities and trust in Gideon. In past relationships, Eva maintained that “the only control I had was to be the one who left, instead of the one who was left behind” (202). Eva’s commitment to Gideon forces her to abandon these patterns. Gideon allows himself to let his guard down and become vulnerable with Eva. He learns to communicate his needs, particularly regarding Eva’s tendency to run away from disagreements. Rather than controlling Eva, Gideon chooses to build a room for Eva in his room as a safe space that allows her the time and space to process her turbulent emotions in her own time. By the novel’s conclusion, Eva adapts to Gideon’s needs and alerts Gideon when she feels the desire to leave. Through open dialogue and built trust, Eva and Gideon learn firsthand the power of surrender. Their relationship grows deeper and more stable, which allows them to build more trust.
Emotional Healing Through Sex
Trust is pivotal to the development of Eva and Gideon’s relationship. Guarded due to their trauma, Eva and Gideon struggle to trust one another while grappling with their pasts. Their instant sexual chemistry propels them into a relationship and forces them to confront who they are and what they need. Sex provides Eva and Gideon the opportunity not only to deepen their intimacy and trust but also to heal from their trauma.
Each sexual experience ultimately bonds Eva and Gideon closer together. They delight in pleasuring one another and finding reassurance in each other’s embrace. Eva comforts Gideon with sex after his nightmares and remarks on how “I knew from my own nightmares that being held and loved could push the specters back into the closet for a little while” (141). While sex does provide an escape, eventually Eva and Gideon must confront their pasts. A turning point occurs at Gideon’s family’s garden party when Gideon and Eva have sex in the library. Despite her past trauma related to anal penetration forced on her by her stepbrother Nathan, Eva asks Gideon to pleasure her anally “‘because I believe your touch can erase Nathan’s’” (223). A result of their built trust over time, this moment marks a shift for Eva. Rather than avoiding the past, Eva uses her powerful sexual relationship with Gideon to process her trauma. She believes that, by committing this act, Gideon “‘can give my body back to me” (224).
Gideon too experiences this healing through sex. In the aftermath of his nightmare and attack on Eva, Gideon becomes overrun with guilt. Despite the triggering nature of Gideon’s attack, Eva does not abandon Gideon. The couple remains united and finds comfort in each other’s arms. Carefully, Eva initiates sex with Gideon to help “‘make us forget’” (274). Instinctually, they navigate each other’s bodies carefully as they are “apprehensive about the future and the wounds we could inflict with all of our jagged edges” (275). This instinctual drive to heal each other through sex helps Eva and Gideon learn to trust each other and “to trust our instincts, too” (277). They remain committed to each other at the novel’s conclusion and continue to use sex as tool of reconciliation and healing.
The Power of Submission
After adhering to Eva’s request to experiment with anal penetration at the garden party, Gideon introduces the concept of domination and submission. Independent and stubborn, Eva resists the characterization of herself as submissive. As a survivor, Eva views submission as victimization. Through Gideon’s guidance and her own self-exploration, Eva learns that, by denying submission, she denies herself the highest forms of pleasure and freedom.
Through her sexual encounters with Gideon, Eva learns more about herself. Surprised by how much she enjoys being restrained during sex, Eva comments on how “Gideon’s total domination of my body ratcheted my desire to an outrageous level. I’d never been so hot for it in my life” (130). Through her subconscious submission to Gideon during sex, Eva experiences heightened levels of pleasure. She submits to Gideon instinctually as she is “helplessly drawn to him" (238-239). When confronted with the symbol of Gideon’s dominance—the ring he gifts her— Eva initially rejects Gideon’s gesture. Without pressure, Gideon allows Eva the space to discover her own understanding of her body. After becoming “more aware of the tension inside me,” Eva chooses to place the ring on her finger (246). Day uses the symbolism of an “invisible rope between us” that draws Eva to Gideon’s dominance (246). She acknowledges herself how “the thought of being collared by Gideon filled me with heated yearning” (247). She chooses submission for herself. In this process, she chooses to honor her own longings and find freedom from the horrors of her past.
Explicit consent and guidelines define dominant and submissive (D/s) relationships. The consent that Eva gives as a submissive is a source of empowerment. Unlike the nonconsensual abuse that Eva experienced during childhood, the explicitly consensual nature of D/s relationships means that all parties involved define the nature and limits of both the sexual act beforehand and have a failsafe—a safeword—to stop the activity if either party becomes uncomfortable. Explicit consent is important in bondage and discipline, dominant and submissive, and sadism and masochism (BDSM) relationships because explicit consent is what separates these encounters those that are coercive or abusive. Helping to define the terms of her D/s relationship helps Eva overcome her internal conflicts to surrender.
