I Love Yous are For White People

Su and the Street Ratz cruise the neighborhood drunk and high on drugs. Su rides shotgun with Dragon Head while Snooky entertains them from the backseat. Snooky proposes attending a party with a girl who works at Taco Bell, but Dragon Head declines because she once rejected his overtures. They drive past a pizza parlor, where Su spots a new student from his school, a Cambodian bully named Veasna. The boy reminds Su of Javi, who laughed when Pa locked him out of the house naked. Su recalls Veasna tripping him on his way out of class, slamming him into lockers, and spitting on his shirt. Fueled by anger and alcohol, Su asks the Street Ratz to jump Veasna. Each gang member reaches for his weapon of choice—a collapsible baton, a crowbar, and brass knuckles—before storming into the pizza parlor.

Su punches Veasna in the throat, cutting off his oxygen supply, while the Ratz take on Veasna’s friends. The fight continues until the manager steps in and threatens to call the police. The gang flees to Motel 6, where they drink and congratulate Su, who basks in the feeling of belonging. Despite the night’s triumph, Su worries about going home to face his father. He tells the truth when Pa asks him where he was. In return, Pa offers to beat him with small sticks and lets him choose the number of lashes. Not wanting to appear weak, Su tells his father to use the big stick and to whip him as many times as he sees fit. Pa respects Su’s choice and sends him to do his homework without a beating.

Two of Su’s maternal uncles arrive at LAX wearing threadbare clothes and old sandals. Pa saved for years to sponsor their emigration from Vietnam, despite the family having disowned Ma. They find factory jobs and adjust to American culture with Pa’s help. Uncle Five (named after his birth order) suggests throwing a nhau, an informal party where refugees “come together to share and cope” (199). Unlike many of Su’s Vietnamese friends, who seek to distance themselves from their culture, and the Street Ratz, who love their culture but not their families, Su wants a connection with both.

Uncles Five and Nine return home with two white geese from the park. Ma agrees to cook them, but only if they promise not to tell Pa, who warned them against killing wild animals. Uncle Five entertains guests with stories about how he caught the geese while Ma plucks them and prepares a goose blood appetizer. Pa arrives and demands to know where the geese came from, but Five succeeds in dodging the question. Su enjoys the party until Five insists he taste the appetizer. Under the watchful eye of his father, Su dips a chip into the gelatin and has a taste. Impressed with his nephew’s fortitude, Uncle Five promises to take Su to Vietnam to nhau with dog meat, a food believed to improve strength and virility. Su is relieved that eating dog meat is taboo in the US.

Su’s problems at school worsen after he fails a geometry test and rumors swirl that Veasna wants revenge. Home is no better. Pa and Ma are constantly at each other’s throats, a situation exacerbated by Pa’s depression. The worse Su’s homelife becomes, the more he turns to alcohol and the Street Ratz.

Vinnie and Bo argue over the remote control. As the oldest sibling, Su feels compelled to step in, but he is too despondent to leave his room. Vinnie protests when Ma intervenes, earning him a smack across the face. Vinnie retaliates by hitting Bo, who immediately begins shrieking. The noise is so loud Su fetches Pa’s mini-blind rod, grabs Bo by the hair, and lashes her body. The beating is vicious, but Pa refrains from stepping in. Su feels guilty when he realizes he has turned into his father. He tries to make it up to Bo the next day by rubbing Tiger Balm on her welts. In tears, he promises never to lay a hand on her again, but she simply nods and goes back to watching television.

Later that day, Veasna’s crew chases Su on his way home from school. Veasna’s brother, a man in his mid-twenties, puts a gun to Su’s temple while the rest of the gang urges him to pull the trigger. Su does not cry out or fight back. Instead, he closes his eyes, remains silent, and thinks of his family. Veasna punches him in the nose. The others join in, stomping and spitting on him. A man picks Su up and drives him home. Pa tends to his injuries and vows to enroll Su and Quy at a better-performing, predominantly white school. Pa fidgets as he tends to his son. Su finally understands that he is loved. 

Su addresses the therapeutic aspects of drawing and journaling during childhood. His journal, which serves as the basis for his memoir, includes all the things he could not say to his father. He discovers it tucked in a box during college, but he puts it aside for 12 years. Su studies psychology, earning an MA and completing coursework for a PhD. He travels to Vietnam on a school-sponsored trip without his father’s knowledge. Although he struggles with the humidity and smog of Ho Chi Minh City, he enjoys the vibrant street life of his birth country.

With his father and Uncle Five in mind, he asks a bellboy where to eat dog. The bellboy directs him to a street near the airport called Dog Meat Avenue, which he locates with his Vietnamese host. Su feels queasy when he hears the dogs whimpering at the restaurant, but the sight of dog meat on other patrons’ plates puts him at ease. His host orders a variety of dishes, including barbecued yellow dog and dog stew (made with the head of the animal), both of which Su enjoys. The dog intestines are less palatable, while the boiled dog proves repugnant (though Su eats it to be polite).

Su recounts meeting his future wife after transferring to a new high school. He also describes her pregnancy, which coincided with writing his memoir. The prospect of fatherhood makes Su reflect on his upbringing, and on what kind of father he wants to be to his daughter, Sky. Su concludes with insights about his father. He understands that Pa loves him and raised him the best way could.