The Last Housewife

Shay Deroy is aware of her body and how it draws attention from men. She recently left her job at The Slice, where she wrote articles, to devote herself to writing a novel, though she is struggling to put it together. Her life is monotonous, passing each day with her friends and her husband, Cal.

Shay likes true crime podcasts, and she has recently started listening to Transgressions, a podcast hosted by her childhood friend Jamie Knight. She keeps the podcast a secret from her friends and Cal, because the sound of Jamie’s voice attracts her. The newest murder Jamie discusses is that of Laurel Hargrove, who was Shay’s best friend in college. Jamie reveals that Laurel was hanged on the Whitney College campus in New York, but he is not convinced it was suicide. Shay remembers that her friend Clem also killed herself on their college campus, noting that she and Laurel were responsible for Clem’s suicide. Jamie suspects that Laurel was murdered because of defensive wounds on her arms, which were not included in the police report. Jamie notes that Laurel’s death is personal for him, saying he had a complicated relationship with one of Laurel’s college friends.

Jamie reviews Clem’s suicide, noting that he tried to find his friend and revealing her name is now Shay Deroy, though Jamie knew her as Shay Evans. After college, Shay changed her contact information. When Clem died by suicide, she had the words “IM SORRY” carved into her arm, apparently self-inflicted, and her body was found in the showers of the athletic center of the Whitney campus. Jamie notes that both Clem and Laurel seem to have died by suicide in similar places, as Laurel’s body was found at the performing arts center on campus. He reveals that upstate New York has an 11% higher rate of missing women between the ages of 18 and 35 than the national average. New York governor Alec Barry claimed that he would investigate these disappearances two years prior, but the investigation seems to have stalled.

Jamie requests information from the audience, specifically addressing Shay and asking her to reach out. Shay feels out of place in her own home: “It [the house] wanted me calm and docile, and in my panic I was disobeying” (14). Cal calls her, and she sees a text from him jokingly chastising her for going to Houndstooth, a restaurant, without him, meaning he is checking her credit card charges. Shay explains how the balance of power between her and Cal shifted in Cal’s favor when she quit her job six months prior, and adding that Clem and Laurel would be shocked to see her life now. Shay laments that she is a housewife rather than a writer, and she resolves to go back to New York to investigate Clem and Laurel’s deaths.

Shay reminisces about coming to New York for the first time, leaving her hometown of Heller in East Texas. She shudders as she passes a mansion that frightens her on her way to the police station. Shay remembers going to the station years prior when Laurel and she were freshmen. Shay recognizes the chief of police as Adam Dorsey, the intake officer from her previous visit to the station. Dorsey yells at Shay, insisting that Laurel’s death was a suicide and says he doesn’t remember Laurel and Shay. He makes some offensive remarks about women, and Shay leaves, heading to Whitney College. Finding the performing arts center, she parks her car and cries.

Shay recounts how she met Laurel and Clem 12 years prior. Some girls had invited Shay to an off-campus party, and the next day, Shay realized that she’d left her phone at the party and went back for it. Finding her phone, she heard a cry coming from the basement and found Laurel partially undressed on a futon. Laurel, distraught, told Shay that she was sexually assaulted and potentially drugged by a man named Andrew. Shay recognized Laurel’s expression and, having survived a similar assault, tried to comfort her. The two agreed to go to the police, and they met Clem on their way out of the house. Clem was upset, saying she knew Andrew, and she accompanied Shay and Laurel.

At the police station, Laurel asked Clem and Shay to come in with her, and Shay took an assertive role, telling the receptionist that Laurel had been sexually assaulted by Andrew. Shay discovered that she and Laurel were both from single-parent homes. Dorsey was the intake officer, and he dismissed Laurel’s situation, accusing her of falsely accusing Andrew. The three women left, with Clem sprinting back to Andrew’s house. Though Laurel protested, Clem used a tree branch to smash in one of the windows of the house, yelling for Andrew to come out. Shay remembered a school burning, and she let Clem continue.

In the present, Shay goes to the performing arts center where Laurel’s body was found. A student gives Shay a suicide prevention pamphlet, but Shay rejects it and calls Jamie.

Jamie is happy to hear from Shay, and he suggests that they investigate Laurel’s death together. Shay insists on leading the investigation, and Jamie acquiesces. Jamie meets Shay at the River Estate, where she is staying, and he is excited to see her, though his excitement fades when he sees that Shay is married. Shay remembers growing up with Jamie, and Jamie is surprised to hear that Shay returned to Texas. Shay ignores a call from Cal to focus on the case. They agree that Laurel was murdered, and Shay reveals to Jamie that Clem had the words “I’m sorry” carved in her arm when she was found on the Whitney campus years prior. Jamie asks if this new case has anything to do with a man they met in the city, but Shay is not comfortable addressing that memory. Jamie notes that Laurel’s case file has no photos, and he says Laurel was unemployed after leaving a catering business five or six years ago. The two agree to meet the following morning to find Laurel’s apartment and question her landlord. Shay says she will also try to contact Laurel’s mother.

Jamie brings coffee the next day, and Shay is shocked that he remembers her old coffee preference. Jamie and Shay meet Linda Morgan, the owner of the building in which Laurel lived. Shay is shocked that Laurel did not leave New York, and Linda reveals that, after Laurel had lived there for a couple of years, she would disappear for months at a time, only returning to sleep for a night. The rent checks Linda received were sent from Dominus Holdings, where Linda assumed Laurel worked. Linda reveals that Laurel appeared to be distressed or depressed before her death, crying at night. Linda shows Jamie and Shay a photo of Shay, Clem, Laurel, and their fourth roommate, Rachel Rockwell. Rachel’s face is scratched out with pen marks. Shay says that Rachel was “off,” but she does not elaborate. On the back of the photo, Laurel wrote “Tongue-Cut Sparrow.” Jamie finds another picture of Shay, Clem, and Laurel, in which Shay’s face is scratched out with pen marks.

Shay has a dream that Laurel is hiding from a man, then falls into a hole in the ground. Jamie picks Shay up in the morning, bringing her favorite childhood soda. Shay reveals that she and Cal got married one year prior; they met at a fundraiser at which Cal was the largest donor. Jamie suspects that Shay’s mother is happy she married a rich man, but Shay says that she does not have regular contact with her mother. Jamie and Shay find Clarissa Barker, the caterer who employed Laurel, and Clarissa notes that she hired Laurel seven or eight years prior, and that Laurel quit five or six years ago. Like Linda, Clarissa notes that Laurel started disappearing after a couple of years. Shay asks about “Tongue-Cut Sparrow,” and Clarissa links the phrase to the Hudson Mansion, a location at which wealthy people hold events and parties. Laurel quit during an event at the Hudson Mansion when she seemed to see someone she recognized. Jamie and Shay conclude that “Tongue-Cut Sparrow” is a secret society.

They intercept Edie Marlow, the student who found Laurel’s body, as she exits a classroom. Cal calls Shay, and Shay tells him that she is writing a lot and wants to stay in New York for a time. Cal is upset, but Shay hangs up on him to focus on Edie. Edie tells them that Laurel had a symbol cut into her arm—a triangle with vertical lines coming down from it, like a temple or jail. Jamie and Shay return to the River Estate and head to Shay’s room to discuss their next steps. They agree that they need to infiltrate the Hudson Mansion to investigate Tongue-Cut Sparrow, and Shay reports that she has not heard back from Laurel’s mother. Jamie asks to interview Shay for the podcast. Shay is reluctant to explore her past, but she agrees.

This chapter is a transcript of Jamie’s podcast, Transgressions, episode 705, in which Jamie interviews Shay. Shay explains that she and Laurel were best friends, and she reveals how she met Laurel and Clem following the night that Andrew sexually assaulted Laurel. Clem was a radical, in Shay’s mind, who fit in well with the liberal atmosphere of Whitney, while Laurel was soft-spoken and introverted. Shay suspects that Laurel was traumatized by her father’s death, which occurred when she was 15 years old and which left Laurel in charge of looking after her mentally ill mother. Shay reveals that she, Clem, and Laurel tried on costumes Laurel made for a performance of Henrik Ibsen’s A Doll’s House. While Shay found safety in looking like a man, Laurel broke down in tears when she put on men’s clothes because she looked like her father. Shay reflects that she and Clem felt obligated to take care of Laurel and tried to make her happy.

For their junior year of college, Laurel convinced them to move into Rothschild, a dormitory closer to the performing arts center. Rothschild had four-person suites, so they invited Laurel’s friend, Rachel Rockwell, to live with them. Rachel was cold and indifferent most of the time, except when any of them were upset, which excited her. She did not help them but seemed to want to know the best way to hurt them further. One day, Rachel insisted that Shay, Clem, and Laurel meet her father, and Jamie asks if Rachel’s father was the man he saw in the city. Shay becomes distraught and ends the interview.

Jamie and Shay investigate the Hudson Mansion, but no one is willing to tell them about the Tongue-Cut Sparrow. Shay spots a busboy who tells her to take an elevator to the basement and use a secret knock to get in. At the door, an irritable man tells them that they need to pay $1,000 each to get in, and they need to follow all the rules, such as leaving all their possessions at the door and taking a mysterious pill. Shay resolves to take the pill to gain more insight into Laurel’s experiences. The pill seems to be Ecstasy, a party drug that reduces inhibitions and creates a feeling of euphoria. Inside the Sparrow, there are pools of water and bars, and a crowd of people, mostly men, seem to be buying and selling sexual acts. A man offers to pay Shay for sex, but she tells him that she is with Jamie. The two find a secluded pool to collect their thoughts, and a woman approaches them to see if they want to buy sex from her. When she offers to humiliate Shay, Shay realizes that Laurel was probably coming to the Sparrow for masochistic reasons, and the woman reveals that Laurel was a regular.

They leave, and Shay discovers two missed calls from Laurel’s mother. When she calls back, Laurel’s mother, audibly drunk, says that she tried her best to take care of Laurel. After Laurel’s father’s death, Laurel and her mother both struggled to cope, and Laurel’s mother reveals that Laurel had a history of self-harm. Laurel’s mother doesn’t stay on the phone, and Jamie begins to doubt that Laurel was murdered. Shay insists that Laurel did not kill herself, and she offers to tell Jamie the rest of the story from their interview earlier.