17 pages • 34 minutes read
Caroline Elizabeth Sarah NortonWe Have Been Friends Together
Fiction | Poem | Adult | Published in 1850A modern alternative to SparkNotes and CliffsNotes, SuperSummary offers high-quality Study Guides with detailed chapter summaries and analysis of major themes, characters, and more.
Background
Authorial Context
Caroline Norton was an extremely popular writer during her lifetime but is largely forgotten now. While the book “We Have Been Friends Together” appears in, The Undying One and Other Poems, was favorably reviewed upon its publication in 1830, this small poem did particularly well. It was widely anthologized during the Victorian era and beyond. While the 1830s were difficult for Norton due to the accusations made by her husband, the publication of The Dream and Other Poems in 1840 helped solidify her reputation. According to historian Dr. Andrzej Diniejko, Norton gained a reputation as the “Byron of poetesses” (a link to Diniejko’s article can be found in Further Resources). Lord Byron (1788-1824) was a prominent English poet twenty years Norton’s senior. Famous and flamboyant, Byron was well known, and it is likely Norton would have been influenced by his work. As quoted by Diniejko, in 1840, Samuel Taylor Coleridge’s son claimed Norton had the same “intense personal passion by which Byron’s poetry grasps.” Coleridge also compared Norton to poet William Wordsworth (1770-1850) in the way Norton discusses “man and nature.” Norton did use nature imagery in many of her shorter poems as Wordsworth did, and her longer poems did engage in political commentary, often advocating for the oppressed, much like Byron’s work. At the time, for a woman to be compared to men of the fame and stature of Byron and Wordsworth would’ve been a true compliment. However, there might have been a slight jab in Coleridge’s claim since Byron too was involved with a sex scandal: In 1816, he engaged in a very open affair with Lady Caroline Lamb, the wife of Lord Melbourne—the very same person Caroline Norton would be accused of having an intimate relationship with 20 years later.
Social Context
It is important to note that when Caroline Norton was writing women did not have the same rights women have today in terms of marriage and choosing their partner. Women were still subject to their parents’ wishes regarding marriage. Many early Victorians believed women were like children and could not make financial or intellectual decisions on their own. This was particularly true for Norton because her father’s death left the family without sound financial backing. While Norton might have sensed George Norton would make her a poor emotional match, her marriage to him would help secure her own future as well as her mother’s. Personal feelings often did not play a part in marriages at the time. George proved to be a terrible match, both in his inability to keep employment and because of his tendency to become violent. Norton’s writing and editing became the major source of income for the couple. In “We Have Been Friends Together,” written three years into her marriage, the speaker’s longing for the happier days of youth would be something Norton would understand personally. Although she hid her problems from society, Norton was the target of severe domestic abuse. Divorce was highly frowned upon, but when George’s abuse caused a pregnant Norton to miscarry, she left him. At this time, it was very rare for women to leave their husbands, and many of her friends advised Norton to stay since a woman’s place was with her husband. Marital laws at the time did not consider women separate legal entities from their husbands. Not only did George own all Norton’s personal effects (clothes, jewelry, books, furniture), he had all the rights to all her written work—and the money it produced—as well as sole custody of their children. He was within the law to deny her access to her three sons and did not have to tell her their whereabouts. The tragedy of her life and the unfairness of the laws of England at the time drove Norton to advocate for changes in marital law until she succeeded at getting them passed.
