Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?

Martha enters the empty living room. She talks to herself and calls for George but receives no response. She makes a drink and has an imaginary manic conversation with her husband, in which they both agree that they misjudged each other. Martha screams at everyone and then talks to her father, crying out in baby-talk that she has been left alone. Martha shouts again, demanding that they all come back and telling her daddy that she and Georgie cry all the time, and they freeze their tears into ice cubes for their drinks.

When Nick enters, she is shaking the ice in her glass and repeating, “CLINK!” (186) Nick watches and declares that she has lost her mind like everyone else. He found Honey in the bathroom, peeling the label off a brandy bottle, and she had winked at him. Martha doesn’t know where George has gone. Martha waves him off, telling him, “Relax; sink into it; you’re no better than anybody else” (188), and Nick disagrees. Through her drink, Martha mumbles pointedly, “You’re certainly a flop in some departments” (188).

Nick defends himself by saying that Martha thinks that every man is a flop. Martha agrees all of them are, and that only one man has ever made her happy: George. Nick refuses to believe that this could be true, but Martha asserts that there is more to their relationship beneath the appearance. George accepts and loves her, countering her in her tempestuousness. He matches her dysfunction, although she knows that she’ll eventually go too far one night and either push him away permanently or break his spine.

Nick replies that he doesn’t believe that George still has a spine. Martha mocks him and tells him that he doesn’t understand the world or relationships. Nick’s feelings are hurt. The door chime rings, and Martha orders Nick to answer it, pronouncing him the new houseboy. Nick resists, offended. But Martha reminds him that he has already been strategic about his career ambitions by chasing her around as if he were impassioned, and that he’s now embroiled whether he likes it or not.

Nick grumbles but opens the door. He is greeted by a massive arrangement of snapdragons. Martha is pleased, and George, in the doorway with his face blocked by the flowers, intones, “Flores; flores para los muertos” (195), which translates from Spanish as “flowers for the dead.” George enters and greets Nick cheerfully as his son, welcoming him home for his birthday. Nick tells him to get away. Martha laughs and says that Nick is the new houseboy. Martha directs Nick to get George a drink, and George orders Nick to put the flowers in gin, but Nick refuses, tossing the flowers on the floor.

George complains that he picked those flowers by moonlight, and Martha and George argue about whether there is a moon out or if it has gone down. George backs his side by telling a story about sailing near Majorca, but Martha calls him a liar who has never been to the Mediterranean. George counters that his parents took him to celebrate his college graduation, and Nick interjects, asking if this happened after he killed them. After a short, angry silence, George retorts, “Maybe,” and Martha adds, “Yeah; maybe not, too” (201). George starts reassembling the flowers.

Nick is exasperated, and George says, “Truth and illusion. Who knows the difference, eh toots?” (201) George calls Nick a houseboy, and Nick denies this angrily. George says that either Nick had sex with Martha, or he’s a houseboy, and he asks which it is. Nick pleads with Martha to say that he isn’t a houseboy, and after a moment, Martha does, seemingly a little ashamed. George is sad but relieved, and Martha reminds him pleadingly that the difference between truth and illusion doesn’t matter. George replies, “No; but we must carry on as though we did” (202).

Nick thanks Martha, but Martha isn’t interested. George starts throwing snapdragons at Martha like spears, repeating, “SNAP!” (203). Martha gets angry, but he won’t stop. George announces that they are going to play one more game: Bringing Up Baby. Nick objects, but George reminds Nick that he wouldn’t want it to get out that he had sex with Martha for the sake of his career. Martha and Nick both give in. Pleased, George tells Nick to go and get his “wifelet” (205). Nick wants to leave her alone, but George insists, and Nick exits. Martha is apprehensive, but George promises that the game will be fun, and that after this one game, they can all go to their respective beds.

Martha continues to plead, and George gets angry. He grabs her by her hair and tells her that after everything she’s done that night, she can’t just decide to end the evening. George tells her that he wants a fight to the death, and Martha, now infuriated and ready for a fight, exclaims that it will be his death. Nick reappears with Honey, who jokes happily by rhyming her name with bunny. George tells them to sit and gather for the game. Honey announces that she has decided that she doesn’t remember anything from the evening and suggests that Nick shouldn’t remember anything either.

George reminds her of the games that she has been playing, such as “curl-up-on-the-floor” and Honey adds, “peel the label” (212), apologizing sheepishly and showing George the label-less brandy bottle. George remarks that everyone peels labels to get through skin, muscle, and organs to the bones and then further to the bone marrow. George transitions the conversation to talk about their son, whose 21st birthday is tomorrow, and Martha begs him to stop.

Honey continues to pretend that this is new information. George forges on, telling them about their son who grew up to be a good kid, even though he had an unstable mother who would sleep all day and try to wash him in the bathtub when he was 16. Martha pleads more, and Nick jumps in to suggest that George stop, but George asks if he is someone who makes rules there. Nick gives in and says that he doesn’t, earning a fatherly nod of approval from George.

George prompts Martha to talk about their son’s childhood, although he coaches her when he doesn’t agree with the details. Martha describes an easy birth and how much she wanted a child. She describes a happy childhood, despite some issues with nightmares and illness, and a time that he broke his arm after he was startled by a cow. George starts chanting in Latin a Catholic prayer for the dead throughout the scene. As Martha waxes poetic, George notes, “There’s a real mother talking” (222). Suddenly, Honey exclaims that she wants a child. Then Martha says that her child’s idealistic childhood was marred by a father who was drowning and wanted to pull everyone down with him.

George pushes Martha to explain what he did, but Martha will only say that he grew up and went to college and has turned out just fine. George takes over and calls Martha “a misunderstood little girl” (224) who has an alcohol addiction and a husband who is a failure. He says that Martha’s father doesn’t care about her, and their son had resented her for constantly using him as a weapon against George. Martha counters that their son was ashamed of George. They argue which one is the liar, and both claim to be the only one who gets letters from him.

George’s Latin chanting reaches a climax as he speaks simultaneously with Martha’s monologue about how hard she tried to raise her son well, and how he is the only light in the utter darkness of her life and marriage. Honey starts shrieking for them to stop. George prods her to say why, but she refuses. George announces that he has a surprise for Martha about their son. Martha begs him again to stop, but George insists that he is in charge and has some unfortunate news. Honey starts to cry.

George tells Martha that while she was in the kitchen with Nick, the doorbell rang, and he received a telegram that said that their son has died. He was driving on a back road when a porcupine had caused him to swerve into a tree. Infuriated, Martha screams, “YOU…CAN’T…DO…THAT!” (231). She keeps shouting that he can’t make these decisions himself. Nick tells her that George didn’t do this, and George agrees that he doesn’t have that kind of power. Martha demands to see the telegram, and George tells her that he ate it, holding back laughter. Martha spits at him.

At George’s prompting, Honey concurs that he ate the telegram. Martha insists that she will not let George do this, but George retorts, “YOU KNOW THE RULES, MARTHA!” (235). Nick begins to understand what is happening. Whining, Martha asks why George has done this, and George reminds her that she broke the rules by mentioning their son to other people. Martha cries that sometimes she forgets.

George tells everyone that it is nearly sunrise, and that it is time for the party to end. Nick turns to George and asks, “You couldn’t have…any?” (238). Almost in unison, George and Martha reply, “We couldn’t” (238). Nick and Honey say goodnight and leave. George and Martha make small talk, and then Martha asks whether George really had to kill off their son. George replies, “It was…time” (240). Martha isn’t sure, but George promises that things will be better.

Martha still isn’t sure, so George repeats himself and adds, “maybe” (240). Martha asks if it will just be the two of them now, and George says that it will. Martha still isn’t sure. George starts singing, “Who’s afraid of Virginia Woolf?” and Martha replies, “I…am…George…” (242). She repeats herself, and George nods in solemn agreement.