Why I'm No Longer Talking to White People About Race

“I write—and read—to assure myself that other people have felt what I'm feeling too, that it isn't just me, that this is real, and valid, and true.”

Questioning someone’s reality, judgments, and experiences is called gaslighting. Eddo-Lodge reads and writes about racism to combat the gaslighting people of color experience when white people deny the existence of structural racism.

“To be white is to be human; to be white is universal.”

White people assume whiteness is the norm in all social spaces. This explains why white feminists failed to see the problem with the all-white cast of Girls, even though the show was set in New York, one of the most racially diverse cities in the US.

“Thinking about power made me realize that racism was about so much more than personal prejudice. It was about being in the position to negatively affect other people's life chances.”

This quote is about reverse racism, or racism against white people. Black people may hold racial prejudices, but reverse racism does not exist because Black people do not wield enough collective power to detrimentally impact the lives of white people.

“Everywhere I looked, I could see slavery’s legacy.”

Eddo-Lodge traveled to Liverpool, Britain’s largest slave port, while studying Black British history in university. She imagined what life was like for the 1.5 million Africans who passed through the city on their way to the colonies. Britain’s legacy of slavery, alongside the complicity of white people, is impossible to ignore in this historic city.

“Faced with the collective forgetting, we must strive to remember.”

This quote addresses the erasure of people of color from British history. University courses about Black British history are scarce, as are documentary films on the subject. As Eddo-Lodge points out, however, people of color have been in Britain for hundreds of years. Chapter 1 aims to fill the gaps in the history books by providing an overview of the history of people of color in Britain.

“For so long, the bar of racism has been set by the easily condemnable activity of white extremists and white nationalism.”

This passage explains why many people struggle with the concept of structural racism. In contrast to extreme acts of racism, such as lynchings, structural racism is subtle, easy to ignore, and therefore easy to deny.

“We tell ourselves that racism is about moral values, when instead it is about the survival strategy of systemic power.”

This quote identifies power as a critical aspect of racism. White people deny the existence of structural racism not because they are necessarily immoral but to maintain their position in the socio-economic hierarchy.

“We don’t live in a meritocracy, and to pretend that simple hard work will elevate all to success is an exercise in wilful ignorance.”

Most CEOs, politicians, university professors, and other high-ranking professionals are white men. These men did not reach the tops of their fields through merit alone. Race and gender played a role in their successes, just as it hinders the advancement of women and people of color.

“Structural racism is never a case of innocent and pure, persecuted people of colour versus white people intent on evil and malice. Rather, it is about how Britain's relationship with race infects and distorts equal opportunity.”

People of color face systemic barriers in virtually all areas of life. Racist policing means they are more likely to be accused and convicted of crimes than white people, racist housing policies hinder their access to affordable housing and racist, hiring practices make professional advancement an uphill battle. Many rightwing politicians and media pundits blame people of color for their lot in life without recognizing the structural barriers that prevent them from advancing.

“When I talk about white privilege, I don’t mean that white people have it easy, that they’ve never struggled, or that they’ve never lived in poverty. But white privilege is the fact that if you’re white, your race will almost certainly positively impact your life’s trajectory in some way. And you probably won’t even notice it.”

The concept of white privilege triggers white people because it implies that their successes are not based on merit alone. White people’s lives are not free of hardships. However, these hardships are not based on the color of their skin.

“The idea of white privilege forces white people who aren’t actively racist to confront their own complicity in its continuing existence. White privilege is dull, grinding complacency. It is par for the course in a world in which drastic race inequality is responded to with a shoulder shrug, considered just the norm.”

The responsibility for ending racism does not lie solely with people of color but also with white people. To create a more just world, white people must acknowledge that white privilege exists and work to dismantle it, rather than maintain the status quo.

“In Britain’s biggest cities, mixed-race friendships and relationships are now routine rather than controversial.”

Studies show that multiracial people are the fastest growing ethnic group in the UK. Despite Britain’s growing diversity, structural racism continues to permeate British society because demographics are changing more quickly than attitudes and power structures.

“It seems there is a belief among some white people that being accused of racism is far worse than actual racism.”

This quote is about white fragility. Conversations about racism are often derailed by defensive white people who act as if being called racist is more damaging than the systemic racism people of color experience daily.

“Freedom of speech doesn’t mean the right to say what you want without rebuttal.”

Freedom of speech is commonly used to shut down conversations about structural racism and white privilege. As Eddo-Lodge observes, freedom of speech does not give people carte blanche to say what they want without pushback. Freedom of speech means being prepared to hear conflicting opinions, not stopping conversions from happening.

“Power and wealth in this country is still concentrated in very few, very white hands, and power never goes down without a fight.”

This passage focuses on the unfounded fear white people have of losing their place at the top of Britain’s socio-economic hierarchy to immigrants. White people still hold a monopoly on power. Britain’s non-white population is growing faster than power structures are changing.

“I don't see race.”

This quote is about colorblindness. Ignoring racism does nothing to deconstruct it. On the contrary, seeing race is necessary to end racism. We must identify those who benefit from their race and those who are negatively impacted by it. Race bestows power and privilege. Seeing it is the only way to change the system.

“The mess we are living in is a deliberate one. If it was created by people, it can be dismantled by people, and it can be rebuilt in a way that serves all, rather than a selfish, hoarding few.”

This quote is a call for inclusivity and action. People of color cannot be solely responsible for ending racism. Racism is a white problem that can only be solved with the commitment and participation of white people.

“At the point in which feminism has become a placidly white movement that claims to work on behalf of all women, but doesn’t question its own overwhelming whiteness, we really need to think about starting again.”

Eddo-Lodge is highly critical of white feminism for excluding women of color. She offers intersectionality as a more inclusive alternative, arguing that feminism should concern itself with ending the patriarchy and racism and that the one cannot be achieved without the other.

“It's clear that equality doesn't quite cut it. Asking for a sliver of disproportionate power is too polite a request. I don't want to be included. Instead, I want to question who created the standard in the first place.”

In contrast to white feminists, who content themselves with being included in spaces created for and by white men, Eddo-Lodge seeks to dismantle structural racism. She does not want to be assimilated into the white status quo. Rather, she wants to be free of all negative assumptions that her race and gender bring. Her goal is not to change herself, but to change the world. 

“Years before this country had a significant black and immigrant presence, there was an entrenched class hierarchy. The people who maintain these class divisions didn't care about those on the bottom rung then, and they don't care now. But immigration blamers encourage you to point to your neighbour and convince yourself that they are the problem, rather than question where wealth is concentrated in this country and exactly why resources are so scarce.”

Racial and class inequities are inextricably linked in Britain. Those in power push anti-immigrant narratives to distract from the real problem: The concentration of wealth in the hands of the elite. The wealthy are hindering the advancement of white working-class people, not powerless immigrants. It is a classic case of divide and rule.

“Being constantly looked at like an alien in the country you were born in requires true tolerance.”

People of color are made aware of their otherness implicitly or explicitly every day. All-white television shows, workplaces, and schools reinforce whiteness as the norm. Anyone who deviates from this norm is therefore other, or alien.

“There is no end point in sight.”

Justice is not imminent. Structural racism permeates all aspects of society and will take time and effort to dismantle. White people cannot skip to the end point without first doing the painful work of acknowledging their complicity in maintaining racist structures and working to deconstruct them.

“Racism is a white problem.”

The burden of fighting racism has fallen on those who suffer most from racist structures. Eddo-Lodge argues that because racism is a white problem white people must actively work to solve it.